I don’t care to be online.
And it’s not because I haven’t combed my hair.
Well, let me explain.
I don’t care to share my personal life.
Why do I feel like saying so much more than that?
To the bottom of it, I really don’t.
I believe that’s why I’ve truly come to the realization that this is the reason I cannot keep up with this blog—
at least not in the way I originally thought,
by sharing my life or even parts of it.
Let me explain further,
if what I’ve said so far even makes sense to you.
During the last few years—
and by the way, I don’t know if people do this,
but I do—
every once in a while, a few times a year,
I sit quietly, close my eyes,
and meditate on one thing:
If I had no obligations in this world,
if absolutely everything was taken care of—
if I had everything I wanted and needed,
and could do, go, or be whatever I desired at any time—
complete freedom…
All my desires fulfilled.
Everything at the peak of my life.
Then what would I truly be doing with my life?
One thing,
or one of the things,
I’ve realized is that I would not be online whatsoever.
I would literally just enjoy my life.
How?
One thing that always pops up is that I would read—
I would read a lot.
I actually wouldn’t have a lot of things.
Which, by the way,
these past few months, little by little,
I’ve been eliminating and organizing stuff around the home.
That’s another story for another day.
So, so far, I would read a lot.
I wouldn’t have a lot.
I would have experiences.
I would try more things.
The following—
I don’t know if it’s a good thing.
I believe I do know,
but I’m not fully sure it’s healthy—
But I don’t believe I would have a lot of people around me.
Which, in actuality,
I don’t right now.
I just feel like, although I’m OK with that,
I don’t believe it’s how we were called to live—alone.
Again, that’s another story for another day.
One of the other things that truly pops out—
truly, truly pops out—
is that I would help people in a specific way.
Which brought me to another realization:
that I would, in fact, be online—
the only reason I’d be online.
One of the things that pesters me about the human race
is that so many people live blind to the truth.
It’s as if I feel this pull
to break that wall,
that mindset,
that evil.
I feel what many would call a calling—
a purpose—
to bring light into the minds and hearts of people.
I feel that many live in so much confusion.
And again, so much more depth could go into that,
but I’m sticking to the point of this post,
which is:
no, I do not like being online.
But there’s one reason
I’ve decided to go ahead and start being online—
for… wait, let me back up a little bit.
As to the “why” I sit by myself a few times a year
and meditate on this thought—
it’s because every single time I do,
I come to the same conclusion,
the same result.
That’s how I’ve realized what I would truly be doing
if every single detail of my life were fulfilled.
Not just the realization—
well, yes, but no—
it’s deeper than that.
It reveals to me my purpose.
My purpose is to help people uncover the truth about life—
to remove the veil.
I cannot explain the thrill,
the deep-to-the-core satisfaction
that brings to my soul.
To think that one person, two people, three people,
a hundred, a thousand,
even tens of thousands of hearts and minds
could be opened and transformed by the truth—
it’s powerful to me.
To think that through my life,
many others could be truly changed—
it moves me.
So, what’s my point besides the one I just made?
I feel strongly that I should proceed—
to blog, to write, to be online—
but for the right reasons:
for myself,
for my calling,
and for my purpose in life.
Everything else is extra.
like this picture
And this one of my nicely combed hair. 
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